I feel ready for the RWA National conference, but I have no one to room with me. Yet. Silly me, I thought the conference would have a mechanism for hooking me up with someone if I put it in my request for the room. But no. Being a “RWA National Conference Virgin” meant learning the hard way that I have to find someone all by myself. YIKES!!! I just moved. I have no one here, but I did put out an all points bulletin to the two chapters I joined down south with a plea for a roommate. My husband, bless him, says we can afford for me to stay on my own, but it feels soooo wrong to spend all the money for myself.
Any way, that lead to feelings of isolation, unwantedness, unpopularity, and …. well …. really stupid and negative brain patterns. At one point, I thought about not going at all. But gosh darned it, I WANT TO GO. I got my PRO pin status and I CAN BENEFIT FROM THIS. And THIS IS BUSINESS, NOT PERSONAL. I’m not going there to win a friggin’ popularity contest or drink friggin’ margaritas with the gals. NO. I am going to meet editors, agents, LEARN, rub shoulders with people who are there, be inspired….
God, I am such a wuss sometimes.
So now, I am going. Reserved the room, and am crossing my fingers that between now and July 15 I find a roommate. If not, one day I’ll lead a lecture saying I funded my first trip to the national conference by paying myself to clean my own friggin’ toilets.